'I asked myself more and more, do I really want this?'

Marije Hendriks is a student of Applied Psychology and is working on her graduation thesis. A few months ago, she stopped using pills and alcohol completely. ‘I wanted a change,’ she says, ‘and that had a lot to do with my health.’

Marije is one of the students involved in the research project “A little Pill here, a little pill there” of the Living Lab Care and Safety of the research group Addiction Studies. It is an initiative of the Public Prosecution Service that aims to positively involve young people in discussing the social impact of (synthetic) drugs. Over the past two years, Hanze has been involved in this with activities and research. In 2022, Hanze students organized Hi(gh) Hanze on campus, a Hanze-wide student event with Emma Wortelboer as a well-known speaker, and activities such as an Escape Room XTC lab and a Drug Truck. This creative approach seems to work. Students talk openly about their drug use and become more aware of what this costs in terms of environmental pollution and crime. Marije notices in her circle of friends that this awareness often also has to do with their own health.

Mysteryland was the closing act

Marije: 'My decision to stop using drugs and drinking was not a radical decision in the sense that it happened overnight. It was more of a thing that came to mind.’ Although the day it occurred to her was specific, and she remembers that exactly. It was May 30, 2023. 'So then the thought literally crossed my mind that I wanted change. And that that change had to do with alcohol and the use of pills. I wanted to stop, especially for my own health. But at that time I still had Mysteryland coming up and that's something I always look forward to. So I decided that it was going to be a kind of closure.'

Marije was working on her graduation thesis and she noticed that she was much less productive on days after she had been out and had been drinking and using drugs. And that she started to ask herself more and more often: do I really want this? Marije: 'The moment you use, you are cheerful and you have a strong group feeling. But the next day I had no energy at all, I often didn't want to talk to people and I didn't feel like doing things. The aftermath of use is often negative. And so you actually lose a day each time.’

The quitting itself wasn't too bad

Alcohol and pills amplify your feelings. If you feel good, that's fine. But if you don't feel so good about yourself, you actually only feel worse. Many young people feel lonely and suffer from mental health issues. Drugs can give a false sense of connection, which makes you feel good in the moment. That's why it can be so addictive. But the day after is often extra miserable. And every time you use drugs or alcohol, you go through the same cycle.

So Marije decided to quit radically, but how difficult was that? 'Stopping the use altogether wasn't that difficult,' she says, 'it wasn't that bad. I feel a lot fitter now, physically and that's very nice. And emotionally I feel different as well, 'more real' in some way. I feel things more, so the ups, but also the downs. It feels more like myself. And that's actually the most important thing for me.'

Quitting was not entirely without challenges. Marije still likes to go to parties, but she doesn't do it as often as before. She drinks lemonade and people think it's lemonade with vodka. And they say things like: "how boring that you don't drink", or "can’t you have just one drink? You can make an exception this once, can't you?" Marije: 'But that's not how it works. Because if I do that now and again,I can start all over again. That kind of thing sometimes makes it difficult. Then I feel like the odd one out, as it were. And sometimes a glass of wine is a lot of fun. Especially around the holidays, of course, or when you go to someone's house for dinner. But when I want a glass of wine, I wonder, where does that inclination come from? And can I live without it?'

Making young people think

Despite the occasional difficult moment, she can recommend everyone to think about their drinking and drug use. Marije: 'You just have to ask yourself every now and then, what does it bring you? And I sometimes think about what it would be like if you were with a whole group that didn't use. What would the atmosphere be like? What would you be doing?’ This question fits perfectly with Marije's thesis: How can we get students to make more conscious choices about drugs? To this end, she and her friend and fellow student Yana Brakel set to work on design-thinking. 'Come up with creative solutions, in other words,' says Marije. 'We asked ourselves what the main motivation is for students to drink and use drugs, and for many of them it is true that they are looking for a social connection, a sense of belonging. Then we got to thinking: what can we offer as a replacement? That's how we came up with the idea of a board game and we are now developing a kind of Game of Goose. We all come up with questions that can spark conversations. So this is another way to reach out to each other. I don't think students will stop using because of this. But maybe they'll think, I'll skip it this time.'

And what does the future look like?

Marije: 'Initially, my goal was to stop for six months. And I quit on August 28, 2023, so I'm not there yet. But at the moment I'm wondering if I want to start again. I feel much fitter than before, as I said. And in April I'm going to travel, first to Bali and then to Australia. That's kind of a natural highlight. So I think it's probably going to be longer than six months.'

 Read more about Student Wellbeing: High Hanze (Dutch)